The art of surrender

There is so much uncertainty right now regarding the Coronavirus pandemic. Unfortunately, this year has brought so much devastation to my life. I roll my eyes when I reminisce on my New Years resolution to work on surrendering control and cultivating more flow… this has been such a “be careful what you wish for moment” and at this point, I feel I have no choice but to surrender. I'm brought to my knees.

Sorting through my mom's things shortly after she passed, I was so moved and inspired by her writing, her accomplishments, and her art. She had reached so many of her goals and had created a beautiful life that was filled with many passions. More than ever, I desire a life filled with the people and things I love. I’m only interested in my truest desires. I want to practice more presence and gratitude for perfect, simple moments. I want to feel the sunshine on my face more and dirty my hands in the garden.

I know that I have the inner strength to face all of this adversity and become stronger, but I do need to give myself grace during this grieving period. Even though the future is so much different than I thought it would look like, I feel more clear now on what is important, and even in my sadness I have hope.